Year End HoLiday :)

on the 1st day of christmas,
my true love sent to me

a partridge in a pear tree..

on the 2nd day of christmas,

my true love sent to me

2 turtle doves,

& a partridge in a pear tree..

on the 3rd day of christmas,

my true love sent to me

3 french hens,

2 turtle doves,

& a partridge in a pear tree..

on the 4th day of christmas,

my true love sent to me

lalalaalalalaaalaalaa ;)

another festive season..another holiday..feels the same tho, since i'm having my mid-term break..but not a free nothing-to-do holiday..i've got asgnmnts & thesis dat needs 2 be done by 2nd Jan'08..haven't done much yet, i'm caught up in dis wonderful holiday..& the fact dat last nite (23/12/07) i had my pre-christmas eve celebration wit friends..huhu!! i guess dat celebration is a private story.. ;p ..b4 dat, juz the 5 of us, juz sitting at a mamak wit shisha & food/drinks, each had about 3glasses of coffee/juice/ice tea..we were thirsty from talking, hahaha ;p , but it was quite enuff 2 create a happy jolly mood..i was with emi, fino, joe & sheikh (they both came down from penang)..the others couldn't make it (too bad)..if not i think it would have been more chaotic coz most of us can really talk & laugh non-stop..we strive 2 entertain ourselves.. ;p

my other group of close friends had 2 go back 2 their hometown since 20th Dec was Hari Raya Aidiladha..ctea, faiz, ayie, helmi & alem are all far far away in another land..hehehe, & no i didn't 4get about hari raya even tho the christmas spirit was overwhelming..i mean everywhere there's dis christmas sale & offers..very tempting! all of a sudden i remember ayunni & her new born daughter..i haven't had a chance 2 c them..plus the saddest thing is i didn't even ask ayunni her little girl's name :( ..how rude can i be wen i wanted 2 b her fairy godmother?! not a gud start, gotta call her soon..

like every other year, i celebrate hari raya aidiladha wit ctea & her family..& as usual i would dive into the food as much as my stomach can expand, hahaha! i juz love homemade cooking..the sight & smell really gave me a big appetite, nvr can resist dat..ctea's mum makes delicious mee curry- wit prawns, fishballs, kerang (cockles), sambal, tauhu, taugei, etc...yumyumyum *drooooooling* ;) ..besides dat, they had nasi minyak & mutton curry, spaghetti, nasi lemak, & alot more..but the dessert was my 2nd fav- baked cheese cake & Secret Recipe's chocolate indulgence cake..fuhhh! juz imagine all those food..it's heaven wen u live alone & it's nvr a pleasure 2 cook 4 urself & eat alone, no fun!

soon 2008 will come knocking on our doors..another year 2 go thru..can't wait :) ..well, hope every1 had a great 2007, full of adventures & experiences, a past memory 2 cherish ;p

Juz Another MeLanchoLy Day...

sumtimes i don't understand why certain situation happens 2 me..especially if it makes me sad, angry or any of the negative traits..like the world is against me, giving me a tough time..i know life can never be perfect & no one is perfect, but i would like 2 wish 4 a never-ending happiness..my wishful thinking..it's alwez juz a moment of laughter, joy & smiles..it doesn't last as long as i want it to..in the end all i have is the memories..& wen i go down memory lane, sum of it brings a smile &, sum juz sadness & sorrows..all so confusing..i think my life is confusing, or i'm juz confuse..either way, no one will understand..watever i go thru is not the same as other ppl, i know every1 has their own confusing down time..

wen it comes 2 personal feelings, i'm juz not a champion, there's so many challenges i can't seem 2 overcome..i end up thinking too much..it's hard 4 me 2 trust ppl, & sumtime i don't trust myself, especially wen it concerns relationship..all emotions jumbled-up in me..the ending of a failed relationship juz breaks me..the hurt is so painful, it's hard 2 4get..leaving a deep scar..invisible on the outside but crystal clear in me..

lately i try so hard 2 move on, leaving behind an unpromising happiness..i try not 2 think about it at all, but it comes 2 me..i hate feeling sad, sad 4 myself, hoping 2 get thngs back 2 the way it was & blaming myself dat mayb thngs could hv been different if i had tried harder 2 fix thngs..i guess it was never meant 2 b if i'm the only 1 trying so hard 2 make it work, it's suppose 2 b a 2-way road..i'm trying 2 permenantly stick 'his lost, not mine, i've got nothng 2 lose' quote in my mind..i can deal with it mentally but not emotionally, it's sumthng i can never control, dat's the hardest part of moving on..

(i remember a close friend said 2 me "i know u as a tough girl, independent & strong minded, but wen it comes 2 relationship/guy/love, u're fragile, u juz break & fall apart"..mayb there's a truth in there)...